A Whole New World

I am turning 30-years-old this coming Thursday. Yes. I am no longer in my twenties. Does this bother me? Not as much as I thought it would. But I definitely think my thirities will hold a fantastic new world. One with a surprising amount of reality, truth and light, while offering less of the antonyms associated with said trifecta.

As some may have realized, I am a follower of Jesus Christ. A follower, whom I pray, does not give Jesus a bad name. But knowing my downfalls and sinfulness despite full forgiveness through belief in His death and resurrection; I'm sure I am a poor ambassador at times for the "J" man.

This coming year, as I turn 30 and leave my twenties behind, I look forward to what the Lord has in store. "Look forward" is said lightly; God often throws twists, turns, trials and many difficult tests into the lives of those who long to sit at His feet. Though I often find my mind wandering when He desires my full attention, I do (in my broken way) desire to rest in His teachings. "Come to me all you who are weary and heaven-laden and I will give you rest..." Jesus goes on to explain that we can exchange the burden of the world for His yoke (teaching). He swears it is light and does not work us to the bone. Do I believe this? Yes. I have experienced this. Christ's "yoke" requires no work on our part in light of eternal salvation; He has completed the task, run the race, fought the fight. And He did not do so for selfish gain. No. He did so for the benefit of the elect--all those who come to faith in Jesus Christ are sealed until the day of salvation in the Father's hand. We are forgiven, redeemed, saved.

One truth Christ's yoke has attempted to etch onto my heart: the importance of prayer. I have sat at His feet and asked for things and yet never received. Why? Because I ask with wrong motives so that I may spend it on myself. Lately, the subject at hand: children.

Having endured two back-to-back 12 week miscarriages (complete with DNC's) I found myself demanding things of God. And all I received in return was silence. That made me confused and hurt. But God was not silent--He was just waiting, whispering, willing His onto this Earth. My hands held the task of patience, full submission and utter trust.

Well, I haven't even turned 30 yet and I forsee a wonderful life-changing event coming my way: Adoption.

My husband and I have put the subject at the foot of the cross and it seems the Lord is moving us in that direction. My sarcastic human side wants to scream, "Finally!" Yet, God is: never late, never early, but always on time. I have no idea what this journey toward/into adoption will look like. But I do know my God (the one and only God) is good and great. I find rest for my weary bones only in Him.

And that, my friends, is the beginning of my whole new world.
So long twenties.
Enter the thirties.